Zoo of Memory

A dream, a memory

Time arrested 

Flash

Sunshine from 

Long ago

Lost but not

A hot Arizona afternoon

Me my 12 year old self

Sitting on the tortoise statues

At the Phoenix zoo

Feeling the smooth stone

The shape like an ancient tortoise shell

And the real tortoises

In the shade beyond the barrier,

The smell pungent

Their slow movement barely visible

I'm with my grandparents 

My mom and dad,

My "little" brother, as tall as me, sits on a turtle too

Even an absent big brother 

No zoo for a 15 year old

But he is there still

In my life

In who I was then

All of it is there

I am once again

A girl with grandparents

And parents

A little brother 

And big brother always off on his own--

Even from 54--my parents gone my grandparents gone

My brothers no where near my everyday life-

When these things come out of the ether

The sun is just as hot and bright

The smell of animal dung sharp

Reality

Again

Or

As always?

I am still 12 years old

And also 54

And 84 and a newborn greeting the world

All at once

Spectacular dimensions

Unknowing but there

We feel it in the moment

And it lives, 

lingers, 

ever ever

There.